By Alicia Kalka
Rejection is one of the most painful experiences we face in life. It stings, lingers and can shake our confidence to its core. Yet, with the right perspective, rejection can be a powerful tool for redirection, leading us to paths we never imagined and opportunities we never thought possible. As I reflect on my journey, I realize how moments of rejection (or events I perceived as rejection) were pivotal in shaping my career and life. This perspective is particularly relevant for families and students in West Virginia, where the challenges of completing a college degree can often feel insurmountable.
Growing up in West Virginia, I’ve always loved the vibrant energy of summer, especially in July. What was a barren landscape with winter-shortened days is now lush and green, and the long sunny days beckon us to explore and embrace the warmth and vitality of the new season. I think this is how we should view rejection — as a call to a new season.
In my own life, there have been numerous instances where I have faced rejection. One experience stands out vividly. I was 18 and graduated from Capital High School with an average high school GPA. While I received some scholarships to attend multiple universities, they were not significant — less than $500. To 18-year-old me, I had to fight the feeling that I “wasn’t good enough.”
Many students in West Virginia face similar feelings of “rejection.” Whether they fail a class, don’t get into a desired program, struggle with the financial burden of college, or come from nontraditional family situations. These situations can feel like barriers and, too often, derail academic careers before they even get started. However, I want these students to embrace the notion that these moments of perceived rejection can serve as crucial turning points and opportunities for redirection and reflection.
Reflection is a crucial component of this process. When faced with rejection, reflecting allows us to understand what went wrong, what could have been done differently and how we can improve. It provides a moment to pause, reassess our goals and make informed decisions about our next steps. We gain clarity and insight through reflection, which can lead to personal and professional growth.
I think about the many families and students in our state who feel disheartened when they don’t finish their degrees. Maybe they failed a class or two or had to drop out for personal reasons. Maybe they didn’t have the money to complete their degree, or maybe “life” simply got in the way. It’s easy to view these experiences as failures, but what if we used these moments to reassess our goals, explore new paths and find alternative ways to achieve success?
The statistics are telling. Nearly 80% of high school students in West Virginia consider going to college, yet less than 50% do. Many cite the expense, the perceived lack of value and uncertainty about where to start. Many are sidetracked by perceived rejection. This is where the concept of redirection becomes vital. If financial burdens are the issue, many ways exist to make college more affordable. West Virginia has numerous programs and scholarships designed to help students manage costs. Fairmont State University, where I work, has strategically kept tuition rates affordable and even lowered residence hall rates to support our students.
For families and students reading this, I urge you to embrace the concept of rejection as redirection. Don’t let setbacks define you. Use them as steppingstones to explore new avenues, discover what truly drives you and build resilience. The future of West Virginia depends on our ability to adapt and persevere and this West Virginia woman believes you can achieve anything you want!
