by Jennifer S. Bankston
Lately, it seems like not sweating the small stuff is all anyone can handle. And sometimes not even that.
I recently watched a man, frustrated by a long line at the pharmacy, ring the bell for service at least 10 times before knocking whatever was on the counter to the floor. His outburst pushed those of us in line, already standing 6 feet apart, farther back. His behavior made me think of my own challenges, and how, right along with me, so many of my friends and loved ones are struggling in new and striking ways as we enter a third year of COVID-19.
COVID-19 variants and ambiguity about what do, combined with our increasingly politically charged lives and uncertainty for investors, have fueled confusion and anxiety for many.
So I set forth to figure out how I might feel more peaceful in this new normal by asking people how they are coping — what they are doing to stay coolheaded as stress triggers overheating.
It started with posing a simple question to friends, colleagues and clients. It grew to querying strangers in parks, the supermarket — anywhere I could, as safely as possible, ask people how they were managing, what were they doing to find joy and keep calm.
The answers were heartening, comical and revealing — and some uplifting. I talked to more than 250 people, who provided me with myriad answers.
Unable to restrain the professional marketer in me, I categorized the responses and defined some of the personas.
The hobbyists
A childhood friend quipped, “Don’t judge me. I’m not one to take up hobbies, but three hits from the Reddi-wip can when I finally shut my computer off after work. A creamy, delicious treat that’s satisfying.” A friend in New Jersey said, “Calm to me is a kettle-boiled bagel with cream cheese. Is a bagel connoisseur a hobby?”
Those weren’t the only comfort food and cooking indulgences that came up. People also mentioned gardening, painting, puzzles, games, music and crafts. A teenager told me mastering the cornhole game in his backyard has been his most recent source of serenity.
Many kids answered, “Roblox,” a global platform that brings them together through play. I bought some of the company’s stock and quickly gained 35% before selling. Not too shabby.
The thrill-seekers
A group of 20-somethings, gathered at our local food truck during lunchtime, said they have taken up all sorts of extreme sports, including rock climbing, to lower their stress levels.
I’m not sure if dangling more than 100 feet in the air would relax me, so I will stick with the power of a good walk.
The connectors
A small neighborhood group gathered in ugly Christmas sweaters to find the street with the gaudiest holiday lights.
A woman in her mid-20s said she feels overwhelmed right now, but watching pet videos of other people who also have rescue Chihuahuas grounds her.
The mind-body-spiriters
Some use meditation and spiritual pursuits as tools to keep them calm.
Many went to outdoor yoga classes last year, which made them calmer. But once the classes got crowded, many stopped going because of the stress of not knowing if the class would be filled to capacity, even outdoors.
I received phone numbers and website addresses from people suggesting I contact their tarot card readers and psychics if I wanted to find joy in 2022.
The journeyers
A friend quit her job as an investment banker and left New York City to move to Charleston, S.C., a place she had never been.
I met a family that had spent four months camping, working remotely and home-schooling their three children, all with only a tent and gear.
Then recently my husband showed up in our driveway with a surprise purchase, an RV the size of a school bus, ready to take off into the wilderness. I’m still contemplating if the first trip will be peaceful.
The other buckets
A parent at my daughter’s volleyball game answered my question with one of his own: “Who knew teaching my son to drink from a cup instead of buying more juice boxes would bring me joy?”
One woman told me she painted her bedroom four times until she found the right, soothing color but then had anxiety over spending so much money.
After compiling my research, I was reminded that not everything has to be grandiose; simple things can bring pleasure like a bed with clean sheets, or for me, the day the library reopened.
When I went for a recent hike without my phone, I felt a cool breeze as I listened to the sounds of nature. I took delight in a chipmunk scurrying past.
I was calm.
