MORGANTOWN — It’s New Year’s Eve.
Time to lie to yourself and others.
But in a good-natured, well-meaning way. Lies told in the spirit of a holiday tradition said to date back some 4,000 years to the ancient Babylonians.
So don’t beat yourself up.
According to History.com, a little over 147.2 million Americans will make a New Year’s resolution this year.
About 8% of that number will be successful.
Not great.
Of course, there’s one easy way to ensure you don’t blow your resolution.
Don’t make it.
Wyatt Goehring shared that secret Monday while at his post at Four Horsemen Comics, in the Morgantown Mall.
“I’ve never failed at one and I’ve never had one that worked because I’ve never done them,” he said. “My absolute real answer is New Year’s resolutions are just people telling themselves they’re going to do better, but they never do. It’s the same thing every time. You get all gung-ho about it, then it’s forgotten by the end of February.”
Maybe there’s a better way.
Jenna Williams said the trick is setting a reachable, short-term goal.
“A couple years ago me and my mom swore off fast food for the month of January. We knew we couldn’t do it all year, so we just said January and that worked,” she explained.
Any thought of extending it into February?
“No,” she said, admitting her memory may be affected by the ravages of time. “But I was probably like a junior in high school and I’m 20 now, so it’s been a while.”
Indeed.
Of the frequent fliers when it comes to resolutions, fast food is a biggie.
Summer Blosser said she hasn’t actually made a resolution in five years or so, though she’s unofficially in the midst of one now.
“I can’t keep them,” she said. “But I told myself a couple months ago I was going to eat less fast food and I’ve done that, so I guess I can keep that up. I’ll call that an early New Year’s resolution.”
And what goes hand in hand with a better diet? Exercise, of course.
That’s the goal of at least one local liar.
We’ll call him John Doe.
“Oh yeah, I’m going to start hitting the gym, hard,” Doe said, grinning. “Don’t put my name on that. I’ll tell you right now, it ain’t gonna happen.”
